Children are weak of mind and susceptible to flashy gimmicks, this is a fact. This is how places like Chuck E. Cheese are able to dupe them into perceiving their series of shitty attractions as a day of wondrous novelty when taken as a whole. The sugar-rattled tykes zip from plaything to plaything, never slowing down enough to notice that the pizza sucks, the coin-to-ticket exchange rate is criminal, and the ball pit is a hotbed of pink eye.
In this way, kid is a lot like being shitty drunk. Both share impulsiveness, the singular pursuit of fun, and a feeling that everything is totally awesome. This explains the popularity of places like grownup play places like Dave & Buster’s, i.e. Chuck E. Cheese’s and cheap liquor. For many adults the overpriced food and children’s games are a small price to pay for the opportunity to publicly rebuff such shackles of adulthood as indoor voices, sportsmanship, drinking in moderation, and financial responsibility. In late 2014 Plank, an adult entertainment center of a different breed, opened in Jack London Square. one which fit the new Downtown Oakland renaissance culture. Plank promises a more highbrow experience than a Dave & Buster’s with its slogan “Beer Garden, Bowling, Bocce” and its concurrence with the Downtown Oakland renaissance. I twice visited Plank—once in late 2015 and then again last weekend—to see if it truly is the playground for discerning adults it appears to be. Here’s what I found:
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